come as you are...and they mean it

i dont even know where to start on this blog. the only thing i can think is: incredible. yesterday i was standing there and singing along with the rockin band and it hit me, "HOLY CRAP!! we just moved here for this." i was shocked lol i just stood there in awe that we are finally here. i have been making observances and noting things in my mind and now i want to put them down on something where i can go back and re-read them sometime in the future. i have never seen a church that so gets what Jesus was about. its fabulous. here's some of the stuff i've gathered....

1. i love our GP smokers. i love walking up to my church and seeing 10-20 smokers out front hanging out. churches always say, 'come as you are!!' but do they mean it? would they mean it if a couple people were puffing on their cigarettes out front of their building when people are walking in? i love my sunday morning chat with our GP smokers =)

2. GP is the first church i have ever been a part of that they have said 'come as you are' and 'we dont care what you look like and what your baggage is' and they mean it!! i feel like i can come in and wear whatever and be whoever and talk however i want to talk and they will be glad i came. finally...someone who TRULY accepts all.

3. i love that it doesn't matter what the people up front look like. our pastor is a swackit wearing, jeans with holes sporting, young punk =) one of the guys in our band, every sunday he wears a big gray stocking hat. so awesome. i can remember being yelled at by one of my parental units for wearing a hat in church as a kid. i didn't understand why that was a big deal....and still don't. im glad its not here.

4. lives are being changed daily! everything is so real. if it doesn't work, we dont do it. if Jesus would not have been down with it, we don't talk about it. we do not do something just for the sake of doing it because its the way it has always been done. forget that.

when i was hanging out after church, ben was chatting with some people and asked me to 'man' the welcome table. so i was greeting people and not sure if they were new or not because im still new =) i met a guy with a weed shirt and a curly mustache. we talked about how cool it would be for him to walk around and play with his mustache like some kind of deviant lol this was his 2nd sunday and he loves it. he feels accepted. he was never a fan of church before...but GP has struck something inside of him. i am glad that i gave up everything to come here. totally worth it!!

Let me put a disclaimer out there...this may sound like i am saying GP is a perfect church but they are not. these are human people attempting to do the work of our Savior and things will get messed up. however...this stuff rocks.

settling in

first off, i apologize for the lack of blogging lately. with moving in, going on a week-long vacation, and starting a new full-time job/job hunting it has been hectic. so where do i start?...

moving in went fine. things we frequently use are pretty much out of boxes. living with people is an adjustment but we keep remembering that Jesus has a big plan for us so we endure.

i started my job on monday. i was really nervous about it. i really enjoyed my last office so i was a little worried about how this would go. it's definitely different than my last office but i LOVE it!! it's a perfect fit for me. they keep me really busy and that is exactly what i want. i don't do well with having a bunch of down-time with nothing to do. i guess im too ADD for that =)

aaron is still job searching. he is putting in his subbing applications tomorrow morning. he has a few possibilities but nothing solid as far as full-time employment goes. we are just trying to trust God. we KNOW He called us here for a reason....so what is it? we know we are to be a part of GracePoint but whats the rest?

this whole experience has been totally rewarding...and HUMBLING. i feel like this entire year has been leading up to this move...or preparing us to make this move rather. this whole year has been about breaking us of who we thought we were in things, our jobs, and other people. we couldn't have made this move if we hadn't learned those things or saw them. i remember one night laying in bed...and just crying. crying is an under-statement...i was sobbing. asking God 'WHY?? I AM HUMBLED ENOUGH, MAKE THIS STOP!!' Everything was breaking, embarrassing, etc.

we continue to be humbled. everything we are doing sounds so....nuts. i have never been embarrassed to tell people what i do or what my husband does or where we live. in a way, ive been ... not proud as in arrogant but happy with where we were and didn't mind sharing the info. over vacation, the couple we were visiting (Jenny) was having a college girls hangout night or whatever. so we were all hanging out and none of them knew me so they are asking me all the typical conversational small talk stuff. this is about how the conversation went...

college-ette: so are you married or have a boyfriend?
mwah: im married
c: oh really!? cool. what does your husband do?
m: well he is currently unemployed.
c: oh gotcha. so where do you live?
m: with my mom.
c:...... oh. *turns to someone else because im a loser*

i try to explain that God has called us to a really awesome ministry but i know not all of them 'got it' or cared why we moved. it was...humbling to say the least.

that night...i lay in bed again and had another sob session with Jesus. it's okay to let Him know you are angry, scared, confused, and/or frustrated. if you can't tell your best friend....who can you tell? i ranted about 'why would you ask us to come live with my mom?? why would you ask us to MAKE our life hard?? how could it be part of your plan for us to not know how to pay bills next week and to hope it works out?? how is this your plan??? to prosper and not harm you....whatever.'

well i just let that little situation slide. then a couple mornings ago i got up a little early and decided to go for a little walk/run with my puppy. as we were jogging along, i was admiring the beautiful sunrise. it was so simple and so beautiful. all of a sudden...i was overcome with a wave of peace. a knowing of how GREAT my Jesus is!! then i remembered...the Son of Man had no where to rest His head. why? well...that wasn't the point of Him being here so why should it be mine? we know exactly what God called us here for. so that's the point...and nothing else.